a few examples from 'how to fool yourself - a guide to a happy life'


#1
when you find yourself stuck in a traffic jam, get philosophical and think in detail about
your purpose in the traffic jam, is it to smell the flowers ; is it to slow down the rush in
life ; is it to practise some self-control techniques by trying to refrain from cursing and
abusing the jam, and that you're getting late to meet the only date you were going to meet
in the last 6 weeks. think if it's a blessing in disguise, maybe you were going to be stood
up by your date. or is it to sit back and ponder if your life's become like the bumper of
your car ? are your 'head'lights on ? is your steering too hard ? what about the brakes ?
imagine your life to be a car where every part corresponds to an aspect of your life.
evaluate if you need a servicing more than the car.


#2
when you find yourself singing ONLY in the shower, especially when you're alone in the
house, tell yourself you're using the bath for enhanced acoustic effects. all great singers
did this, and this is proof that you've got the IT factor. start spending religious &
quality time [alone] in the bath. and let that voice out. also buy all the britney & raghav
[if you've not heard of him, you have a long way to go, but you'll get there in the end]
cd's and listen to them every waking hour [and sleeping hour as well]. look like them, talk
like them, worship them. know you're the next one. you've got it in you, and for this world.
so keep it going in the bath, let it be your stage.


#3
when you're jobless, or have been a failure, tell yourself you could be a new age guru. this
is the easiest and quickest way to earn big money, and also earn respect. this is also the
quickest way to meet the rich & subsequently rich and dumb life partner. do know that all it
takes to be a guru is to pick out THE words from a Westers or an Oxford and write 5
self-help books titled -
a) where the birds don't fly - the 10 step guide to creative freedom
b) maximising the minimum inputs - the art of living a smart life
c) 51 ways to Neverland - how to keep the child in you alive
d) bombs and biscuits - how to tame a monstrous dog
e) the couch & you - how to love your relationships
after the above, life will be a smooth ride, and you can take private sessions for anyone, and quote anything, even if it doesn't make sense it won't matter. for you've been accepted, and established.


#4
when in any miscellaneous doubt, simply tell yourself you're Michael Jackson's 'Nose'.
imagine the whole world knows you, you've got millions invested in you, you're the subject
of interest of the highly acclaimed critics around the world, and most importantly, unlike
anything/any-being/any-entity on this earth, you indeed are 'unique', the only one of it's
kind. if this doesn't trigger you to cloud 9, go die, for you're not worth being a fool.